Idiocy and Stupidity

Posted on Sat Feb 29th, 2020 @ 3:49pm by Commander Tienn Iteela & Commander Sokanon It'kla & Commander Galiaan Fordring & Lieutenant Commander Elizabeth Yamaguchi-Solusar & Fleet Captain Torilla Yamaguchi & Company Sergeant Major Jeffery "The Mountain" Duval & Master Gunnery Sergeant Chalan Fal & Staff Sergeant Yuri Grissom

Mission: Mission 33: Losing the Peace
Location: Various Locations - USS Roanoke
Timeline: 1800Hrs - May 5th, 2391

Jamin Bremer sighed. "Think we used enough?" he drawled. "I don't think weeb did." Jamin was drunk as he slammed the bottle down before he almost threw it across the table towards what he assumed to be his brother.

The thin, toothpick looking Bamin Bremer picked up the bottle, and attempted to drink out of it, only to find it empty. "You fat slob, you drank all the booze."

Jamin groaned. "Uhh... what?" he paused after a moment as he reached down and caught the head of a second bottle or three bottles that these two were planning on drinking. He ripped the head off only to have his brother snatch it from him. "Hey ass....hoe... what ya doin..."

"Your takin it all, you fag utly fuck," Bamin replied, as he took one big swig of the bottle.

Jamin sighed. "Fine.... be dat way.... gimma my bottle...." as he looked at the bottle, almost longingly.

"Git ur own, fag boy," Bamin replied, as he then proceeded to chug the bottle.

"Fuk you ass... whipe..." Jamin growled as he tried to get up, he however slumped onto the table, a soft groan emerged from his mouth.
"I alwight...I think.."

Meanwhile, Chalan, whom already had an anti alcohol hypospray in hand walked over and put his hands on the shoulders of the two bremers. "Hey privates, so, this is where you two clowns are, you two know you are supposed to be scrubbing the deck in the barracks right."

Jamin blinked. "Uh...what Funny..?" he meant to say 'Gunny' but it came out wrong. "We finished.... see its spotless..." he indicated the deck with a wave but ended up slapping the Gunny.

Chalans first response was to kick Jamin's feet out from under him, causing him to fall flat on his face. He then applied the hypo, then, not waiting for Bamin to make his move, Chalan then grabbed his arm, then applied the hypo to him as well. Still holding on to Bamin, Chalan then kicked Jamin in the gut, saying, "Come on lard boy, get up."

Jamin groaned as he tried to get up, then he fell flat on his face for the second time. "Uhh..." then he heaved himself up to his knees. "Fuck..." he groaned in pain while hauling his bulk to his feet.

Chalan grabbed him by the collar, saying, "Your a disgrace."

Jamin groaned. "Umm... crap... I'm gonna juke..." and with that he threw up on the deck before he landed on his knees, in the puddle of puke.

Chalan didnt give Jamin the chance to stay on his knees. He still had Jamin by the collar and began to pull him to the barracks.

Jamin groaned in pain. "Wha.... whats going on?" he looked around but this made it something of an issue for Chalan to hold onto him.

Chalan gave jamin a slap across the face, "You are going to go to the barracks and do the cleaning detail that you have been skipping out on."

Jamin felt the sting of the slap as he yelped in pain. "alright... alright... just... don't hit me again?"

Chalan pointed at the door, saying, "Move it, or I castrate both of you."

Bamin wasted no time scurrying out of the room and down to the barracks.

Jamin followed his brother but he tripped over his own feet and felt down, flat on his face with a loud bang. He tried to get up but promptly fell over again.

Chalan then proceeded to deliver a not particularly strong groin kick, but enough for the fat slob to feel it.

Jamin groaned as he rolled over but rather then curl up into a ball, he was able to slowly haul his massive bulk to his feet and out the door he went, almost falling on his face again but he caught himself this time using the far bulkhead walls to brace himself.

Chalan went over, picked up a chair, then said, " Private, move your ass or you are wearing this."

Jamin, now completely terrified proceeded to run down the hallway, or was more of a waddle but he was moving.

Once the two Bremers where there, Yuri Grissom immediately put them to work alongside Mickidiot Bremer, Kosidiota Munphuck, Mudphit Bremer, and Koslazi Munusless. Once Yuri stepped away Mudphit Bremer proceeded to drop something wet and slimey down Jamin's shirt.

Jamin yelped before he reached under his shirt to find a cold fish which had been cooked. "You sick fuck" befpore he hauled off and mushed the food into the back of Mudphit's shirt, trouble was it splatered everywhere. "Fucking idfiot."

Mudphit turned and got some Fish in his face which caused him to lash out blindly, catching Bamin in the face with his fists, while missing Jamin completely.

Bamin used his mop and swing it at Mudphit, but he missed and hit Mickidiot in the face. Mickidiot then picked up the bucket and threw it at Bamin, getting the dirty water all over Mudphit and Jamin. Bamin dodged the bucket by tripping and falling flat on his face, while the bucket struck Kosidiota in the face. Infuriated, she then picked up the fallen bucket and hurled it in mickidiots direction. He dodged the bucket and ran straight into Koslazi, knocking her and himself to the ground.

Jamin was able to more or less stay out of it as he laughed at everyone involved, even if he was soaked with dirty water before he got beaned in the head with the bucket, knocking him out cold.

He dropped to the deck with a loud thud, then he did not move.

Mudphit then proceeded to walk over to Jamin and with another bucket full of dirty water, he poured it all over Jamin's face

Jamin coughed and spluttered as he wretched. "I... keel you."

Mickidiot heaved his massive body off of the groaning Koslazi, but before she could get up, he then squatted over her head and let off a massive fart.

Koslazi let out a loud groan as she coughed. "Oh god... oh..." and with that she punched Mickidiot in the ass.

Jamin got up, snatching up a chair he smashed it over Mudphit's head, crumpling the chair as he reduced it to splinters.

Mudphit fell to the ground in a crumpled heap, not moving, while Kosidiota went up and soccer kicked jamin in the groin.

Jamin groaned as he dropped to his knees. "Ohgodohgodohgodohgod." he mumbled.

Mickidiot, surprised, fell back with his fat ass landing on Koslazi's head, at which point he released another fart.

Koslazi reached up and she shoved him off of her. "Suck fuck.... get away from e. you gutless intestinal parasite.."

Bamin went to stop kosidiota, but he accidentally stepped on a fallen bucket, causing him to fall forward onto Koslazi, knocking her forward and causing her to fall on Jamin. Mudphit meanwhile groaned in pain and stirred. Mickidiot managed to heave himself up again, but then tripped and fell on Koslazi and Jamin.

Jamin screamed as he felt the weight land on his legs, he mashed his fists into the deck plating the way an infant would. "Getoffameeeeee!!!!!!" he wailed loudly

Koslazi rolled at the last second but his bulk still caught her legs, she shrieked in agony.

Mickidiot's attempt to get up was foiled by kosidiota smacking him in the face, he fell down again, flailing his arms about and smacking Jamin hard several times in the face with his fist. Bamin then kicked Kosidiota's legs out from under her, causing her forehead to smack straight into Koslazi's face.

Koslazi fell to the deck, out cold.

Jamin meanwhile curled into a ball, in agony.

Kosidiota attempted to pick herself up, extremely disoriented, but didnt get very far before passing out herself and falling on top of Koslazi. Bamin then picked up one of the mop handles and smacked mickidiot across the head, knocking him out. Then looking around, seeing that everyone else was either knocked out or close to it. He then proceeded to pull both the unconscious Koslazi's and Kosidiota's pants and underwear off, and went to go hide them, but proceeded to trip on a mop bucket, causing him to smack his head on the ground, knocked completely out.

The door opened and in walked Sergeant Major Duval as he stopped. "What the hell happened in here?" he inquired of the crowd of bodies as he snatched out his holorecorder, he snapped a picture as one of them suddenly leapt to his feet or rather tried to but since he was in motion, he crashed into Duval.

Mikidiot Bremer landed on his face as Duval hauled himself back to his feet, he reached down as he grabbed a fistfull of the guys hair as he hauled him into the bathroom, Duval snarled angrily as he proceeded to give the man a swirlie as he dunked the man's head into a toilet.

Duval growled. "you wanna piece of me... you fat bastard.."

Meanwhile Kosidiota began to stir, though she still wasn't fully registering what was going on. Bamin gave off a loud groan but didn't really move. Mudphit finally started to register what was going on, and started to crawl away.

Duval grabbed the first guy after he was sure he was half drowned, before he hauled him up then with one swift strike of his foot, the man went hurtling into the bulkhead, before he stalked back into the next room.

He snatched up Kosidiota as he yanked her to her feet, he then headbutted her. "Wake up asshole." and with that he hauled her into the bathroom and he shoved her head into the same toilet that he had recently used for the previous victim.

Mudphit meanwhile, managed to get to his feet, and ran to the door, throwing down his combadge. He went into another area of the barracks, and hid in a closet. Jamin then tried to leave next, but was stopped by Bamin, whom tripped him and caused him to land loudly on a mop bucket.

Duval yanked the woman, he never caught her name as he quickly realized she wasn't wearing pants or underwear before he shoved her asside, he stalked into the next room, quickly noticing one of them was missing. He growled before he plucked the second woman, before hauling off and driving his foot into the chests of one of the men lying around. "Wake up Buttercups..." he growled loudly. "I said WAKE UP!" and with that he drew his sidearm and proceeded to shoot a light fixture nearby, it exploded with a nice boom. Making everyone jump.

Duval sighed as he dropped the smaller of the two women, this one was also not wearing pants. "What the fuck.... is wrong with you six misfits... I mean you were assigned to clean this place up and now it looks like a warzone!"

Jamin tried his best to escape, but Bamin tripped him again, got up himself, and started to run.

Duval drew his tricorder and with expert aim, he fired it like a missile, it connected with the back of Bamin's head, sending him sprawling into a bulkhead, Duval was rewarded with a very satisfying 'splat' as the man connected.

Jamin then hurriedly picked up a mop, and started to mop the floor, saying," Its not my fault, I was trying to clean and the others started it."

Duval tapped his combadge. "Duval to Grissom, your workers all started a brawl... and they ... destroyed the barracks. you need to see this for yourself..."

Yuri showed up moments later and looked over the scene. Dirty mop water was everywhere, there was blood on the floor, and what looked like an old fish fillet. He then commented, "we are missing one."

Duval took a moment to look around the room as his gaze settled on a large closet nearby. "Check it." he commented. "I wonder if these two women were raped or sexually assaulted.."

Yuri pointed to the pants and underwear lying on the floor," Well, they didn't get far, wonder whom did it." Yuri then noticed a noise coming from the bathroom, looked in there, and found Kozlazi violating Kosidiota, prompting him to say, "What... The... Fuck."

Duval sighed softly. "Either these guys want to kill each other or they all want to have an orgy." he then shrugged. "Fuck it.. lets get outta here..." and with that he turned and went out the door.

Yuri didn't waste any time following him out. Jamin simply sat down on the floor, in relief, while, a few minutes later Mudphit got out of the closet. Mudphit then looked into the bathroom, where Mickidiot was drooling on the floor with Kosidiota. Mudphit then pointed at them saying," Ha ha, you guys got swirlies. A thoroughly enraged Koslazi then picked up a bucket and brought it down on mudphits head. Mudphit then flailed around desperately trying to get the bucket unstuck from his head. However, unable to see where he was going he tripped over a fallen mop, landing right on jamin, the bucket, with his head still stuck in it, hit jamin square in the face.

Duval was presently sitting in one of the nearby offices, a stoogie in mouth as he took a drag of it. "This is great..." he said to Yuri who was seated nearby. Duval watched the monitor quietly, a cheerful look in his eye. "Simply unbelievable," he said quietly.

Mudphit desperately tried to get the bucket off his head, when bamin hit Mudphit across the head with a broomstick. However, thanks to the solid metal bucket, all Bamin succeed in doing was breaking the broomstick.

Jamin meanwhile was laughing maniacally at the scene that was playing out before him, his legs were still throbbing but they were not as bad as before.

Mudphit finally succeeded in getting the bucket off his head, and he threw it at bamin, however Bamin dodged and the bucket hit Jamin in the face, again.

Jamin muttered. "Shit" right before he saw a flash of white and then nothing.

Duval sighed. "Look at these idiots.."

Meanwhile, in the bathroom Kosidiota finally realised what Koslazi was doing. she screamed loudly, grabbed Koslazi by the head, and dunked her head into the toilet and started flushing repeatedly.

Duval sighed softly as he knew this shit needed to end so he rose to his feet and went into the barracks, but he took his time, he tapped his combadge. "Duval to Dvald, are you decent Doc?"

"I'm presently doing paperwork at the moment?" it dawned on Siaxx that she needed to be elsewhere. "I'm also going off duty in about a minute or so..."

"Thats good... I got six cases of insanity for your ladies to deal with."

Duval stopped as he entered the barracks. "So... I can hear you thinking Yuri, out with it already?"

Yuri just shook his head, saying," Let them kill each other, that way we don't have to deal with them anymore."

"Do you wanna deliver these six bodies to Siaxx Dvald?" Duval inquired. "You ever seen how angry that little woman gets?"

Yuri shrugged, "I'm just a corporal, I wouldn't be the one doing it."

"But have you ever seen Siaxx angry?" Duval inquired. "Trust me... its not pretty.."

Yuri just shrugged again, "I've never seen Siaxx before, so I would say no."

"Lovely... Lets haul these idiots down there.."

Yuri wasted no time dropping the last of the idiots off in sickbay, then left without a word, leaving them to deal with it.

Sokanon mewled softly as she regarded the six fools that now graced her sickbay as she turned her head to regard the other doctors and nurses present. "So... Ms Yamaguchi, you feel ready for this?... your first solo operation?"

Elizabeth Yamaguchi slowly smiled. "Yeah... I am prepared.." she responded. "Alright guys... Lets do this.... stabilize them all but don't treat them... I'll handle them.."

Sokanon blinked her large eyes. "You all heard her."

Elizabeth went to work, medkit in hand as she began tending to the first one who just so happened to be closest to her. "Lets see... blunt forced traumas, multiple lacerations, broken bones in both legs... wow.. you six really tried to kill each other." she shook her head as she went to work.

Mickidiot, whom was the one being treated by Elizabeth, just groaned loudly, while Mudphit began to complain loudly of a headache. It took him a minute to register that he was in sickbay.

Elizabeth Yamaguchi sighed. "This is gonna take awhile." she turned as she looked at one of the nurses. "Prepare me six recovery rooms... and contact security, post me some guards please... I have a feeling a lot more happened here then what we're being told."

Tienn Iteela nodded. "On it." and with that she turned before darting off to carry out the request, before long she was finished with the first. "Galiaan, would you mind looking at these guys for evidence before I treat the others... I need a moment to jot down my notes from this case."

The more massive woman nodded. "Willdo." she responded.

Koslazi then began to complain, "hey, why am I not getting treated first, I am apart of sickbay, what the fuck."

"You know how this works lady." Elizabeth responded in a rather dismissive tone. "People get treated worst to best. That don't change...and seeing as your awake and you wanna argue with me." she shifted her attention. "Which I don't have time for by the way.... I'm gonna move you to the last person on the list." and with that the younger woman went back to work, treating Bamin Bremer.