What The Hell Happened?

Posted on Mon Mar 2nd, 2020 @ 9:19pm by Lieutenant JG Rachael "Ripcord" Yamaguchi-Cullen & Chief Warrant Officer Ryi "Taffy" Amlari & Gunnery Sergeant Olga Vaal & Colonel Jack "Dirty Jack" Hassel & Staff Warrant Officer Hana "8-Ball" Nakamura
Edited on on Mon Mar 2nd, 2020 @ 9:20pm

Mission: Mission 48: The Third Pineapple Incident
Location: Various Locations - USS Roanoke
Timeline: 1430Hrs - November 5th, 2391

Taffy woke up nude on the floor. Her head felt like it was filled with concrete. As she eyed her surroundings she saw Rachael on the floor next to her, also nude.

"Rachael, are you awake?" Ryi asked.

Rachael moaned. "Mmmm... Ennis.... lemme sleep..." she mumbled in her sleep. "Its strange here..." she mumbled softly, still not moving.

"Rachael!" Taffy shouted. "Ennis isn't here! Wake up! Something bad happened!"

Rachael blinked as she found herself lying supine on the deck. "Taffy.... what the hell am I doing... and where am I?" as she turned to the Andorian who was nude. "Why are we naked... not that your body isn't hot afterall..." she paused. "Wait... did we?" she inquired.

Taffy slowly got dressed. "It's all a swirl in my head." She told her. "I remember enough though. I hope I didn't ruin things for you and Ennis."

Rachael sighed. "Don't worry about me and Ennis.... We'll survive." she responded before she began to pull on her clothing, first her underwear then her pants and socks then her undershirt. "But next time.... what do you say we use the bed...?" she inquired as she regarded the semi-dressed Andorian.

"Well, I don't think we really planned to have sex." Ryi replied. "It just kind of..." And she was interrupted by someone pounding on the door.

"Taffy! Open up!" A shout came from the other side of the door.

"Eight Ball, is that you?" Taffy asked.

"Yes!" She shouted back. "For the love of humanity, let me in!"

Taffy went to the door and in rushed a nude Eight Ball. She had a bloody nose and was in an obvious state of panic. "Close the door! Close the door!" She cried out and Taffy secured the door.

Rachael regarded Eight Ball. "What happened to you?" she asked

"I'm not very sure." Eight Ball answered. She was a little more calm now. "Some red headed maniac started to beat me so I ran. Red headed women are crazy."

Rachael regarded Eight Ball. "Come on over here and lets get you cleaned up." she responded evenly. "Ryi, watch the door, would you mind my lovely?" she said to the Andorian Shen nearby while she led Eight Ball into the bathroom.

Eight Ball followed Rachael. Taffy was watching the door when the banging started.

"You little shit!" A woman's voice screamed. "Are you in there? Come on out so I can kick your scrawny little ass!"

"Sergeant Vaal? Is that you?" Taffy asked.

The banging stopped for a second. "Froststorm?" Olga asked. "I know that little slut is in their with you. Send her out so I don't have to kick your blue butt too."

"Sorry, Sergeant Vaal but your acting too crazy." Taffy replied.

"You bug eared little blue shit!" Olga cried out. "You getting your ass kicked too." And then the pounding started again.

Taffy turned to Rachael. "Do we have a phaser in here?"

Rachael growled softly. "We don't need one..." she responded as she lifted her hand and a large book came across to her. "She comes in... I bean her with this.." as she began cleaning off Eight Ball's face. "She clocked you good."

Rachael turned. "Vaal.... You come in here and I'm gonna fucking HURT YOU!" she yelled.

"There are three of you in there?" Olga yelled through the door. "I'll beat all of you!" And started to really hammer away at the door.

"Rachael," Taffy started. "Dirty Jack told me Vaal was cited for killing a Jem'Hadar with her bare hands. Do you honestly think you can stop her with a book?"

Rachael raised an eyebrow. "Well.. that was fifteen years ago." the younger woman responded. "Before I was born honestly... As soon as the door opens, I throw the book at her." as she wrapped a towel around Eight Ball's shoulders.

Rachael now looked angry. "I can't concentrate with that racket.... gods even Saki has never behaved this badly." she added. "Hell even Daniel has never thrown a tantrum like this.. and he's a toddler." she paused. "Got anything I can use as a weapon...?"

"I don't think we should escalate this!" Ryi told Rachael. "She is in a blind rage. We just need to calm her down."

"Let her spend her rage against that door... she'll have to wind down at some point.." Rachael responded evenly. "She can't keep that up forever."

Suddenly the banging against the door got louder. "That's right, I'm using a hunk of metal to smash down this door!" Olga yelled from the other side and started to bang away again.

Ryi's face turned dark blue. "I can't take this anymore!" She shouted. She then stood next to the door. Ryi seemed to be timing the banging.

Right before Olga was going to batter the door again, Ryi opened it and stuck out her leg. Olga rushed inside and fell onto her face. Ryi then jumped on her, pinning her arms down.

Olga howled in rage as she stood up. She slammed herself backwards into the wall. Ryi grunted in pain as she absorbed the shock. Olga then a second timed slammed herself and Ryi into another wall and Ryi cried in pain. It was then that Dirty Jack arrived, clad only in his trousers.

"Dammit Olga!" He yelled as he grabbed Vaal's legs and pinned her to the floor. Olga cried out in rage but was finally pinned down.

Towering over her, stood Rachael Yamaguchi, who with book in hand stood ready to bean her with it. "The second you get up.... I'm gonna hit you with this.." she growled softly.

"Are you screwing Jack too?" Olga asked Rachael.

Rachael simply growled at her. "I'm spoken for... thank you." as she regarded the much older woman.

Olga looked back towards Jack. "The ship was attacked with some sort of odd weapon. Even though I don't like you I went to check to see if you were alright." Olga told Jack. "I found you on the deck buck naked with that little hussy. When the ship was attacked you decided to have sex."

"We were hit with some sort of sex ray." Jack poorly explained. "I really don't know how it happened but Eight Ball was the closest person."

"A sex ray?" Olga laughed. "You expect me to believe that?"

"Well... he's right. More or less but I believe I might be able to help explain all of this... If you will be still and take a moment to calm down." Rachael commented. "What actually hit you... or rather hit us all... was a rather potent psionic wave.." she explained. "I should know.. Considering it felt very familiar to me." as she stood near Olga, massive book in hand, clearly ready to use it.

Olga looked confused. "Are you saying that this was happened to the whole ship?"

"Yes." Ryi chimed in, still underneath Olga. "It was beyond any of our control. Can you get off of me?"

Olga slowly got up and looked very passive. "Everyone was forced to have sex?" She asked.

"I'm sorry Sergeant Vaal." Eight Ball apologized to Olga. "Dirty Jack was just the closest person next to me. I have no interest in him. In fact, it was like creepy old guy sex." Eight ball explained with a shudder.

"Well, that last part didn't make me feel any better." Jack stated.

"No but it made me feel better." Olga explained.

Rachael sighed softly while she lowered the book in her hands onto a nearby table. "I think the origin point was somewhere in the center of the ship... gods only knows how many people are affected."

Olga looked chagrined. "Rachael and Ryi, I'm sorry I barged in here and bothered you. Chinese girl, I'm sorry I can't remember your name, I'm sorry I beat you up and chased you across the ship."

"My name is Eight Ball." She told her. "And I'm Japanese."

"I'm going to police up the rest of my clothes." Jack stated. "Do you want me to get yours?" He asked eight Ball.

"I'll have Froststorm pick them up for me." She told him.

"Right, I'm the creepy old guy." Jack replied.

"I just have one question." Olga held up a single finger. "There are over a thousand people on this ship. There were raging sex and orgies all over this ship. The passion was bouncing off the walls. And none of it was for me?"

"Well.. this is the second polywater case I've seen.." Rachael responded. "The first was how I met my intended... and Honestly.... I have no idea... I wasn't expecting it... while Froststorm and I were originally having lunch... which...well." she sighed.

"Sorry Olga." Ryi told her.

Olga sighed and left with Jack. Ryi turned towards Rachael. "Where the hell was security? She was making enough racket to wake the dead."

Rachael shrugged. "Who knows... probably busy with an orgy." as she grinned at the Andorian Shen. "Anyway.... all that aggravation has worked up an appetite. I don't know about you... but I'm hungry." she regarded the two women.

"Doubt if we could go anywhere." Ryi replied to Rachael. "Everything is probably shut down."

"Oh I didn't want to go anywhere...." she indicated the wall. "your replicator is as good as anybodies.."

"Can she get my clothes back before you eat?" Eight Ball asked. "I don't like them just laying there in the hanger."

Rachael raised an eyebrow. "Sure.." she paused. "Wait... why aren't you going to retrieve them after you get dressed?." as she smiled. "Ryi might being back someone elses clothing by mistake."

"I just had my face beaten in." Eight Ball replied. "I really don't want to back out there."

Ryi headed towards the door. "Rachael, get some food for the both of us. I'll be back soon."

Rachael nodded. "Okay." as she watched Ryi depart in silence before she went over to the replicator to order herself something to drink. She would replicate dinner right as Ryi was coming through the door.

"I would leave you two to your privacy but I really have nowhere to go." Eight Ball told Rachael.

"Its fine." Rachael responded as she tapped her combadge. "Yamaguchi to Amlari... You feel like having a pizza?"

"Um...anything sounds good." There was concern in Ryi's voice. "This place looks like a war zone. I have Eight Ball's clothes and I'm on my way back. Do you know where Saki is at?"

Rachael paused. "Oh shit." she muttered softly. "Computer... locate Saki Yamaguchi?"

"Saki Yamaguchi is not aboard this ship.."

"Okay... try and keep up with me computer.. what was her last known location and where did she go?"

"Saki Yamaguchi was last located in transporter room two." the computer responded.

"Was she alone?"

"Negative. Command Master Chief Petty Officer Varkon Zevai have her and Sarah Cullen beamed to the USS Courageous at 12:31 local time."

Rachael tapped her combadge. "Yamaguchi to Courageous.?"

"Courageous here." came Torilla's voice. "Whats up sweetie?"

Rachael smiled. "Do you have Saki mom?"

"I do... her and Sarah are hanging out with the cats at my place... I'll return them to you once this... whatever this is has faded.."

"Its looking like its fading now mom..."

"Okay, I'll send the girls back to the Tranquility then." Torilla responded. "I'll see you guys soon. Yamaguchi. out." as the comline went dead.

Rachael tapped her combadge. "Ryi.. Saki is with her grandmother. I can thank Varkon for finding both her and Sarah and sending both to mom."

"I think it would be bast if she stays with her for a while." Ryi suggested. "This place looks a brothel after a national holiday. Anyways, I'll be there in about two minutes."

Rachael sighed as she smiled. "Sounds good." she responded as she went over to the replicator, before she decided to order something that was almost tasteless." Computer. a Great white north pizza."

The dish appeared, with lots and lots of cheese and ham, Rachael picked it up and went over to the table.

Ryi entered and then leaned against the door after it closed. She had a pile of clothes in her arms. "The frozen plains of Shrok look more pleasant." She looked over at the pizza. "Oh, I am so hungry."

Rachael smiled as she took the pile of clothing from the Andorian woman. "Come on and sit down... its fresh.." she smiled. "Eight ball... for you."