Thats no Warp Core

Posted on Fri Feb 28th, 2020 @ 10:39pm by Division Admiral Celeste Yamaguchi-Hobbs & Zuko Omakan

Mission: Mission 31: The Ashes of Eden
Location: Various Locations - USS Dreamcrusher
Timeline: 0800Hrs - April 7th, 2391

Zuko walked into engineering, first walking over to Noqt, his new chief engineer, asking," So Noqt, how are you settling in."

"I am doing well Captain, thank you." Noq't replied. "This ship is an impressive piece of machinery."

Zuko nodded," And a hell of a lot safer than other ships in the fleet. I take it by now you know this ship doesn't use the usual warp core design anymore."

"Yes. I was both surprised and impressed." Noq't told Zuko.

Zuko looked at the back of engineering, where two of the matter-energy power cores where located. "Yeah, the days of highly volatile warp cores are gone. Though I don't get why no one thought of using replicator technology to convert matter into pure energy earlier. But it does make me feel a lot better knowing that worrying about a warp core breach is a thing of the past now."

"Or having to worry about one lucky shot from an enemy ship." Noq't added. "It is going to take me and the engineering crew a few days for us to familiarize ourselves with it."

Zuko shrugged," Well fortunately some of the engineering crew that helped build the ship is still on board, so hopefully it shouldn't be too difficult. I will warn you, there are still a few bugs in the ship still, particularly with the computer system."

Noq't raised his eyebrows. "Oh, anything I should take note of?" he asked.

Before Zuko could respond a frustrated engineer uttered expletives at the computer and kicked it once, causing the computer to say in a monotone," A fire has been detected in main engineering, activating fire suppression system."

Within seconds all the fire suppression systems started emptying foam into main engineering. Zuko had the misfortune of standing nearly directly under one of the dispensers. In a surprisingly calm manner for someone being coated in foam, he commented, " That would be one of them."

While Noq't wasn't under the a dispenser he caught his fair share off foam splash. "Yes, this is a concern." He told Zuko. He wiped off some of the bigger clots of foam. "I'll make the computer system a priority. On the positive side we know the fire suppression systems work." Noq't stated as he pulled a clot of foam out of his beard.

The computer then began to cackle maniacally, prompting Zuko to say," Yeah, that's just the symptom of a wider problem."

Suddenly a hologram of a thin almost ghost white humanoid wearing a jester's costume appeared. The hologram then proceeded to give one of the engineers a wedgie, threw clumps of foam at several others, all while blowing raspberries and laughing insanely. he then ran down the hallway causing even more mayhem.

Zuko still holding a remarkably calm demeanor, added," You know, I have to give credit to the joker whom wrote his program, because we have had a hell of a time getting rid of him. But yeah, we have a poltergeist, some of the crew have started calling him peeves."

Noq't stood there with a dumbfounded look on his face. "I have been a star ship engineer for over twenty years. Never have I seen a hologram jester cause havoc on a ship. I guess it is safe for me to die now because I have seen everything." Noq't stated, almost mesmerized by the cackling jester.

Zuko gave a small chuckle before asking," Well, this still doesn't top that major computer virus that roanoke release to the entire fleet almost two months ago, I'll never forget that one."

"No, that was bad." Noq't replied. "That said, I still find that jester hologram more annoying."

Zuko relied flatly, " Well, by all means, if you can get rid of peeve's by all means do it. But I warn you he has managed to stump just about anyone else whom has tried."

"I'll assign a specialist to that." Noq't responded. "If that doesn't work we'll wait to we get to a star base and have them over haul the computer." He stated. "Now, besides the power plant and computer, what other systems are unique to the Dreamcrusher?"

"A lot," Zuko replied. " For one, the ship doesn't use an EPS grid anymore. The only EPS conduits still in use are the ones that power the warp nacelles. Every other power transfer system uses a directed energy power conduit. A lot safer and less explosive than an EPS system. So we wont have to worry about exploding consoles anymore. There is also the ships armor protection scheme, and several new weapon systems as well."

"I am eager to get a closer look at the new transfer system. It will take some getting used to for old hands such as myself. It should be interesting though." Noq't stated enthusiastically. "Now, tell me more about the weapons systems."

Zhurinko decided to give the simple explanation. " Well, to make a long story short, the dreamcrusher is built with anti fighter and anti ordinance capability in mind. The ship is currently equipped with 128 Vertical launch missile modules, which can carry a variety of missile types, ranging from anti fighter, anti ordinance, anti ship, and a few specialist types. Each module has 12 cells, though right now, they are all empty, due to developmental delays with the missiles meant to go with them. We also have 16 12 shot heavy quantum launchers, the usual pathfinder class phaser arrays, 32 automated point defense turrets, and instead of the spinal lance mounted on other Pathfinders, we have 4 heavy phaser cannon turrets, each turret mounting two phaser cannons. They aren't as individually powerful as the spinal lance, but all 8 weapons working together gets pretty close. plus they arent limited to an extremely narrow forward firing arc the way the spinal lance was."

"That is an impressive array of weapons." Noq't replied. "She is going to be quite the battleship."

Meanwhile, peeves was busy causing more mayhem. wandering into sickbay, but making his holographic form invisible, first thing he did was he shut off all the lights. He then went into the CMO's office where Celeste was sitting doing paperwork, and sent numerous padd's flying.

Celeste was suddenly caught in the center of a small vortex of wind as the dozen PADD's on her table went flying around her. "What the!" she called. "Computer.. what was that?"

The computer replied in a very creepy monotone, "That was nothing but your imagination."

"Wait,.... What!" Celeste blinked as she reached down to pick up her PADD's. "Computer...run a self diagnostic.!"

The computer replied in an almost rapist tone, "No problems detected."

Celeste began to feel creeped out by the tone of voice. "Really... you overloaded bag of bolts, check again..." as she began to become annoyed. "I have a lot of work....wait...are you screwing with me?"

"Noooooooo"

Celeste raised an eyebrow as she arched an eyebrow, getting more annoyed by the second before she stood up. "I don't got time for this.." she turned and went out of her office, not realizing that Peeves the Poltergeist was following her. "I can't even have a morning in peace...I gotta deal with someone elses crap.."

Peeves than randomly made himself visible, and stuck his foot out, causing Celeste to trip.

Celeste's eyes went wide. "What the!" as she fell flat on her face, at the last second she turned her forward motion into a roll and ended up sitting in her ass. "A fucking hologram!" she snarled. "What the fuck!"

Peeves made a face, blew her a raspberry, then ran off down the hallway, cackling manically.

Celeste slowly climbed to her feet as she watched the hologram leave before she went over to the turbolift, she tapped the 'call' button, her fury brewing, the doors opened as she tapped in, one of her medics stepped off. "Hey Doc."

"Hey Millhouse." she responded quietly. "Bridge."

The turbolift car shot to its destination, the bridge., the doors opened as Celeste emerged, she then tapped on the door to the CO's ready room.

Meanwhile, Zuko walked up onto the bridge, fire suppressant foam still stuck in his fur. Looking at Celeste, he comments," Hey Celeste, what's up."

Celeste raised an eyebrow. "Do I even wanna know what happened to you?" she inquired. "I assume you had a run in with our resident Poltergeist?"

Zuko nodded," Yeah, I take it you found out about peeves by now. Yeah, we have tried our best getting rid of him, but he keep backup copies of his program hidden just about everywhere, and every time we delete one, he makes more. Personally I am not sure if i want to congratulate the guy whom wrote his program, or strangle him."

"I have things I want to do to the man.." Celeste responded as she nodded. "Yes... I met him already..." a sigh escaped her lips. "We could always format every computer system on the ship... all of our shuttles, tricorders.... format everything.."

Zuko sighed, saying, "That would take weeks to do, and we would have to be in space dock, lest we strand ourselves helplessly in space doing that."

"Lovely.. So we'll be tormented by this poltergeist until further notice.."
Celeste sighed. "I'd best get back to work..."