Not idly do the leaves of Lorien Fall

Posted on Thu Feb 27th, 2020 @ 3:35pm by Commodore Siaxx "Bluemoon" Dvald-Vaxx MD & Jillian "Phoenix" Sullivan

Mission: Mission 22: Quarantine
Location: Various Locations - USS Roanoke
Timeline: 0800Hrs - January 15th, 2391

Music soundtrack: The Evenstar - Lord of the Rings - The Two Towers

Lt Commander Siaxx Dvald sighed. "I'm stuck in this fucking cage... I want out..." and with that she threw a metal cup at the door, it bounced off and did little else.

The cat protested with a loud complaint as Siaxx plucked the cat from where he was sitting as she went over to Phoenix. "Another five days in this gilded cage." and with that she flopped into a chair. "You know what I need?"

"One don' need ta read your mind, if your face is this transparent," Phoenix spoke with a humored grin.

"I need a good shag...." she responded with a soft growl. "but I think I need to avoid Elizabeth. I'd like to know why she wants to kill me."

"What ya need, is ta sit down. Relax. Think of this as a romantic honeymoon, where all we gotta do is ring room service for a good meal," Phoenix spoke with a wink while she played pyramid solitaire at the small table. Dora was laying on her bed taking a nap.

Siaxx paused. "Oh..." she raised an eyebrow. "I heard that quarantine is this horrible confining experience.." she paused as she looked over at the replicator, she went over and replicated a pizza and before anyone could stop her, she picked up a slice and ate it in two bites. "I don't get it.... how can you stand being in here... and how the heck are you so calm?"

"S.E.R.E trainin' teaches that once captured, you have to compartmentalize. An' ta do that, ya gotta look at the situation. For this one, we have a replicator. We have each other. No interrogators. No physical torture. So ta keep from lettin' tha psychological torture from settin' in, ya gotta switch that scenario," Phoenix spoke calmly. "It aint a skill quickly learned, but you more or less heard tha scenario I just came up with."

Siaxx meanwhile could hear her stomach almost scream at her. "Mmm... you make an excellent point..." she plucked the massive pizza as she placed it on the table before them. "I'm... hungry.." and with that she plucked a slice. "Mmm.." and with that she began to feed, twenty minutes, half the pizza was gone and Siaxx still going strong.

Phoenix had only ate three slices, considering the twins she was forced to carry. But alas she added after the long silence, "Ya know... If you're gonna help me with Furban's matter, you probably should learn S.E.R.E just in case things go sour."

Siaxx paused. "Teach me..." she commented. "I want lots of reading material.."

"D'ya truly wanna be turned into somethin' ya wont recognize?" Phoenix asked in concern.

"I will.... survive.." Siaxx responded softly. "I have two people I want to die... one of them is my uncle...I want my revenge for what he did to me and mine..." Siaxx suddenly had tears in her eyes. "I wanna kill him..... so badly... its whats kept me going all these years... and I want his head, mounted on my fucking mantelpiece... he treats my parents like indentured servants and my siblings as employees in their own lives.."

Phoenix's eyes watered as she heard Siaxx talk like that. If only she knew what a terrible price that was.

"...I took up arms when I was just thirteen, because my Aunt Janell was raped and killed in one of the Spoonhead raids," Phoenix spoke very quietly. "The next raid, I smashed my rifle into Glinn Kajur spinal cord while he tried to rape my friend.. An' he was my first kill. An' he died in a way I would not wish on any enemy."

Siaxx regarded Phoenix. "The spoonheads and my uncle are in a different zip code."

"I think I'll go ta bed now," Phoenix spoke almost stoically as she finished her dink. Then she picked up Dora and gently laid down on her bunk, curling the dog up with her for a bit of comfort.

Siaxx sighed as she pushed the emotion's away, the endless hatred of her uncle brought out the ugly side of her life as she sat back down at the table and continued to eat her pizza.

"Wait a few hours and eat again, once you feel full," Phoenix suggested quietly while she pet Dora.

Siaxx nodded. "I'll do that.." she sighed softly. "I feel.... so empty."

"Just don' make your stomach explode," Phoenix cautioned quietly while she tried to go to bed. Anything was better than having to dwell on the fact that your fiancee was a monster.

Siaxx softly slumped into a chair as she looked at the pizza before slowly pushing the plate away. "I'm not hungry..." she whispered. "I am so stupid.." she added softly, almost to herself. "I feel.... so filthy.... and its all my own fault..."

"...What's your fault?" Phoenix asked with much confusion in her voice.

"I'm a monster.... Tressa was right... and I didn't see it." Siaxx said quietly. "I didn't see it...." as she looked at Phoenix. "You and I seem to have switched places... You used to be the angry one... now... I'm always angry..." she paused. "that's not a slight against you... really it isn't. You're the best thing that's ever happened to me..."

"I'm angry almost all tha time, Siaxx." Phoenix spoke quietly as she continued to pet her dog's belly. "Thing is, I just learned ta channel it... Most of the time, anyway. But they're times when my ire gets too much, even for me."

Siaxx turned as she regarded Phoenix. "This ship.... I feel so... small.." she paused. "we're always getting interrupted, I never get the chance to eat, to drink.. to sleep.... I never get to be myself and... I feel so weak and so stupid for letting it happen.... because all of it.... its my own fault."

"No it's not," Phoenix corrected gently. "These folks have issues. We're just in tha epicenter when their shit happens. Got nothin' ta do with how your actions."

"Jill... I've become what I hate most.... this small, bothersome little creature who lets everything get to her." Siaxx picked herself up and went over to the bed before she perched herself on the bed. "I think I need to reconnect with my family.... I have no idea of where my siblings went to...but considering how we last parted...I know it'll take some doing.."

"I suppose I'll probably paint some in my studio. Not rightly sure what ta do," Phoenix spoke honestly, then tossed Siaxx her PADD, which contained a letter from her parents. "News from home sorta has my muse off."

Siaxx reached out as she snatched the PADD out of the air. "Mmm... Lets see.." as she glanced over the PADD. "Oh shit..." she muttered softly. "cry woe indeed.."

"Meh." Phoenix shrugged. "So long as we help each other, we'll get through this shit."

"I'm not going anywhere.... I will always be here." Siaxx commented, a gentle smile gracing her lips. "As long as I handle this ships insanity..."

"I did like tha art room," Phoenix noted when the silence got too quiet.

"Rachael always wondered if you did.." Siaxx commented softly. "She used her abilities to move everything around, I helped her with it." a smile graced her lips. "I think I could try my hand at pottery..." Siaxx mused. "I will of course be gentle.."

"See?" Phoenix smiled. "You got an activity you'll love."

Siaxx smiled. "Alright... a good reminder about how to be gentle.."