Engineering Shenanigans Never Stop, Do They

Posted on Fri Feb 28th, 2020 @ 5:23pm by Master Chief Petty Officer Uldyssian Davis & Fleet Captain Torilla Yamaguchi

Mission: Mission 31: The Ashes of Eden
Location: Various Locations - USS Roanoke
Timeline: 1000Hrs - April 5th, 2391

"So, what are you working on now," Ra'Vak commented as he walked into engineering, where Kiya and Kashi where busy working on the computer core.

Ra'Vak took a sip off his big cup coffee while he watched them work when Uldyssian Davis came up. "Hey Uldyssian, whats up."

Uldyssian smiled. "Temples services are scheduled to start in an hour... I will be leading the service of course, will you be attending?"

Ra'Vak took another sip of his coffee," Eh, I'll surprise you."

Meanwhile Kashi's eyes narrowed as he noticed a problem, "Why do we constantly have random programs in the computer core that's not supposed to be here."

Kiya sighed as she started looking at the programs code. After a few minutes of examining it, she said," Well, I can tell you that this program is worthless, I'm deleting it."

Ra'Vak didn't think anything of the matter, when suddenly the ships fire suppression system went off, and started spraying water everywhere, prompting Kiya to shout," FUCK THIS SHIP!"

Ra'Vak looked up at the ceiling as the suppression system sprayed water everywhere, prompting him to comment in a very calm demeanor," So, how extensive is this problem."

Kashi looked at the console, saying," Um, the entire ships fire suppression system went off."

"lovely," Ra'Vak commented flatly.

Meanwhile Torilla Yamaguchi was busy feeding the twins when suddenly and inexplicably, it started to rain as she looked up. "Computer, shut off the fire suppressor?"

It continued to rain as Torilla sighed. "Fuck it." before she sighed, then she went to work in replicating an umbrella, she then deployed it as she brought the twins to her.

Teval, meanwhile, was with Seykai, Hakaya, and all their children up in the flight control tower when the fire suppression system went crazy. Teval looked up at the ceiling, then tapped his combadge, saying," Teval to Ra'Vak, another engineering bug."

Ra'Vak nodded," Yeah, another engineering bug."

Teval shook his head," How long until its fixed."

Ra'Vak shook his head," No Idea."

Tevak just shrugged, saying, "Well, I guess it can't be worse than the computer virus endemic. How far did that thing get anyway."

Ra'Vak mentally counted off, before saying, "Well, it made it to every ship in starfleet, the federation council, most civilian ships, the Klingon empire, the Romulans, the Cardassians, the breen, the Ferengi, hell, the damn thing is probably halfway across the galaxy by now.

"Sounds very bad," Zara commented as she walked into engineering with an umbrella, and less water-logged clothes the rest of the crew.

Ra'Vak calmly took another sip of his now very watered down coffee, saying," Hey Zara, so I think that this computer core was programmed by the joker, because this is the sixth or seventh trap we have come across."

"So which dumbass triggered this virus?" Zara asked mildly.

Kiya banged her head on the desk in frustration, while Ra'Vak said calmly, "Well, no one opened anything, Kiya just deleted what looked like a useless file, she has been trying to clean the cluttered gunk out of the core all day, this one, just happened to have another virus trap in it. In all fairness though, she's caught most of them."

"So how many bugs left do we think could still be in there, that we don't know about yet?" Zara asked with equal frustration.

Ra'Vak shrugged," Could be dozens more, if not hundreds, we have only begun to scratch the surface on this damn thing."

The main door to Engineering opened and in walked Commander Torilla Yamaguchi, walking in wearing her uniform tank top and a skirt. "Ra'Vak!" she called. "Can we talk?"

Ra'Vak calmly sipped his water at this point, but didn't move, saying," We're talkin right now whats up."

Torilla was drenched to her skin and her clothing hid nothing of her figure. "Why is it raining aboard ship?" she inquired. "Just.... so I know.." as she pushed her unruly mane of her back away from her face.

Ra'Vak shrugged, saying, "The joker programmed our computer core, its just another one of those prank viruses that got us. In all fairness, we have managed to stop most of the ones we have found from taking effect."

Yamaguchi raised an eyebrow. "Oh..." as she suddenly found herself as a dozen sets of eyes all began to stare at her. "So.... how long till its fixed..?"

Meanwhile, Kashi retrieved a chainsaw and fired it up, while Kiya grabbed an axe, prompting Ra'Vak to say, "Should be within the next few minutes."

"Ah... Good. I'd like to get dry sheets before bed," Zara noted dryly.

Yamaguchi sighed. "I'm so glad I don't have to stand before the Marines soaked to my skin..... half of them would want me right there and then.."

"You aren't a bad looker, Torilla." Zara grinned evilly to her XO.

Yamaguchi blew Tane a kiss. "You... are a tease.." she sighed. "But at times I miss my husband... like now." she admitted.

Teval looked at the ceiling as the water finally stopped. He then looked at Hakaya, Seykai, and all his children, and all of them where soaked to the bone, prompting him to comment," Well, hopefully there are some dry towels we have in our quarters to dry of, but failing that, there is the hair dryer.

Hakaya nodded, with her arms wrapped around herself, she was shivering," Yeah, I think I could use that."

Teval nodded and left the tower with the other Kurokuri. He didn't take long to notice that a number of the people on the deck stared at himself and the other kurokuri as they walked by, but it wasn't until one of the pilots walked by the group that he noticed where they where staring. Looking back at the group of other kurokuri behind him, with their fur wet, it clung to them like wet t shirts, which for the females and Seykai, it ended up revealing their parts. Teval just sighed in disappointment at their immaturity, He didn't get humans some times. Though trouble didn't occur until they where closer to their quarters, when one of the fat human crewmembers wearing a chef uniform walked by.

Crewman recruit Keith Thatcher sighed dramatically. "What is it with you guys... I mean you think you can go wherever you like and not where clothes..." he frowned darkly at the known being before him. "Are you a woman... I can never tell with you furries...."

Seykai looked at thatcher with a distasteful look, saying, "I'm a male you prick."

"You look female to me.." Thatcher responded in a dry tone. "So... girly man.... you gonna stand here taking up space on a deck all day or do I need to find to... find you something to do?"

Teval gave him a nasty look, before seykai could do anything. "Hey fatass crewman, you know what we do to people like you on the roanoke, we space your ass. Now fatty, start running before I slice off your ballsack." Teval slowly revealed the blade inside of his staff, and began to pull the sword free.

Thatcher's eyes went wide before backing off.. "You'll regret this little man!" he growled, in his high squeaky voice.

Teval fully withdraw his sword, and in an instant, appeared directly in front of keith, leveling the blade at his throat," Oh really. Well I'll let you in on a little secret, you see. I know exactly how to make people disappear, without anyone ever finding out. So run fatso, before you end up will no one will ever find you."

Thatcher shrieked like a small child as he turned and fled, as fast as his legs would carry him upon closer inspection one would realize that he left behind a cloud of noxious gas as he departed, a sign that he had defecated himself.

Teval nearly instantly recognized the smell, prompting him to say, "What is with fat people and their tenancy to shit themselves?"