Like a Ton of Bricks

Posted on Thu Feb 27th, 2020 @ 7:10pm by Commander Tienn Iteela & Commander Sokanon It'kla & Lieutenant Commander Elizabeth Yamaguchi-Solusar & Commodore Siaxx "Bluemoon" Dvald-Vaxx MD & Chief Petty Officer EMH Mark Seven 'Joey'
Edited on on Sat Mar 7th, 2020 @ 5:58am

Mission: Mission 24: Open Secrets
Location: Various Locations - USS Roanoke
Timeline: 0900Hrs - January 31st, 2391

Jai Labrosse pointed his rear at Kobumo Munphuck and let loose a massive fart, causing Kosbumo to cringe. "You asshole," She shouted as she threw a padd at him, missing and hitting the wall behind him. Just then Grek came in, yelling," What the fuck are you two doing here, your supposed to be cleaning the catwalks in the hangar, why aren't you.."

Neither of them moved when Grek, having fully gotten annoyed, opened up a nearby box, and pulled out a chainsaw. Starting it with a single pull, he revved the engine and with an evil smile, said, "get going, now."

With a pure look of terror, both Jai and Kosbumo grabbed the mop and bucket as fast as they could and just started running. Grek chased them, revving the chainsaw ever so often. Once Grek saw them get up to the catwalks and started mopping, he turned of the chainsaw, but watched for a few minutes until he was satisfied that they would stay.

About 20 minutes after he left, Jai let loose another fart, deliberately aiming it at Kosbumo, the stench causing her to gag. Jai started giggling like a girl while kosbumo suffered, and finally having enough, she landed one good kick in the crotch, causing him to keel over in pain. She blew a raspberry at him.

After laying on the ground for a good five minutes, jay got up slowly from the ground, saying," I'm gonna hurt you you bitch."

Kosbumo flipped him the bird, and jai squealed, "Fuck you," as he whacked her with his mop, causing her to fall off the catwalk. Kosbumo fell a good 5 meter before landing hard on the deck with a loud crunch, while jai peered over the catwalk. unzipping his pants, he proceeded to then pee on Kosbumo as she laid on the deck moaning. It took her a minute to register what the yellow liquid was that was raining on her.

Suddenly, one of the Deck crew realized what was going on, shouting, what the fuck are you doing, causing jai to step backwards, his foot hit the mop bucket, causing him to trip and fall over the edge of the catwalk, still peeing as he fell to the deck. Kosbumo just barely had enough time to start to scream when Jai's massive body landed on Kosbumo with a loud crunch.

Whitepaw, Hakaya, and Abbado walked up to a scene they hadn't expected to ever see. as they approached Whitepaw could tell that the fat man was dead, as his neck was twisted in suck a way that it was surely broken. As he got closer it seemed that the other crewman was dead as well, but he tapped his combadge anyway saying, "Whitepaw to medical, I have a medical emergency, three to beam directly to sickbay."

As soon as they where beamed to sickbay Whitepaw turned to the nearest medical officer.

Sokanon blinked her large green eyes. "Oh wow.." she gasped. "What the fuck is this.... Siaxx...I'm gonna hurt you woman..."

Siaxx came out from her office. "What are you...oh dear Valen..." she squinted. "Don't I know that fat ass?"

"If you mean Jay then you are correct... you knew them both.." Tienn came over, PADD in hand. "This one is apparently related."

Siaxx sighed. "Sokanon... you were threatening me?" there was no malice in her voice.

"I was..." she paused. "Hitting on you in the obscure Caitian dialect of... Rukting." the Caitian commented

Siaxx smiled. "Alright... then I will see you at my place after you get off watch, bring a medkit and a smile... you'll need both... and bring an overnight bag.."

Sokanon blinked. "Ummm Okay..."

"Right them..." she turned. "Lets seperate these two... Toshnarr?"

The massive Gorn appeared, as if conjured on command as he helped peel the massivly bloated body off of the crushed female.

"Wow... skull implosion.... Does he get credit for blue on blue.?" Tienn inquired.

"She stinks of pee... I assume he peed all over her?" Sokanon sighed. "I'm going to need a shower after this."

Siaxx smiled. "I'll take care of you tonight..."

Whitepaw nodded," Yeah, the really fat one hit the fat one with a mop handle, causing her to fall to the deck from the catwalks. He then proceeded to pee on her as she laid there, but when Abbado shouted, the really fat one tripped and landed on her."

Siaxx shook her head. "Oh dear god.... my brain just blue screened." she sighed. "I gotta go sit down..." she paused. "Computer activate EMH program."

The EMH appeared as if conjured by magic. "Please state the nature of the medical emergency?"

"Deal with that while I go....take a bath..." she turned to the Caitian. "Come on Kitty..."

Siaxx turned and walked out the door, followed by Sokanon. Tienn meanwhile shrugged. "Orderly... take this one to the morgue... I'll process this failure."

The door opened and in walked Elizabeth Yamaguchi. "Well now... this is a biblical kind of doom... was there an accident and six people got crushed together.?"

Whitepaw didn't say anything as he walked out, not really wanting to think about this situation.

Tienn and Elizabeth sighed together as both women simply went to work.